No. 3 - Pittsburgh
It's come to our attention that the temperature in Pittsburgh is 81 degrees Fahrenheit (roughly 26 degrees Celsius). It's also come to our attention that the weather has been astonishingly shit for the past however many months. We know this has distressed a great many of you and we hope today makes up for the terminal vitamin D deficiency you've all contracted over the course of these past few months.
We would also like to extend an invitation to enjoy the weekend a little early and we would like you to begin with a gin and tonic, hopefully before you've left work. It's just a little thing to say "guys, we get it." Also accepted the Spanish version: a gintonic (shown here).
We would also encourage everyone to close their eyes and listen to their neighbors: the kids playing in the streets, the sound of your batty neighbor calling for their cat or the sound of birds scolding aforementioned cat. It will brighten your year.
Finally, we're encouraging you all to put down your telecommunication devices and play an analog game of any of the following: Ticket To Ride, Morels, Ilimat, Bang!, or Uno. Grilling, as an activity, is also permitted.
Once again, we apologize for the inconveniences of weather and overall climate change. We've heard you and it seems as though you aren't keen on the direction things are going. Rest assured, we're doing what we can so you can remain unawares of the detriment to your environment. Be sure to let us know if you have any comments or concerns and know that we read every one of them.
Many thanks and kind regards,